Many relationships run their course and you begin to notice that before long. Keep in mind that a relationship ending is not the end of the world and just because you were with someone for the longest time, it does not mean you have to continue to be with them even when you both feel the spark is gone.
According to Shahzeen Shivdasani, a relationship expert, who also writes about it in her book ‘Love, Lust and Lemons‘, sometimes people live in denial. She shares a few signs that may help guide you and make you understand whether it is time to end your relationship before the beginning of the New Year, which normally means a fresh start.
1. The disconnect: Find out if you are truly happy. “When you are with the wrong person, there is a constant disconnect at the bottom of your stomach telling you that something does not add up,” says the expert, adding that we tend to ignore it. “Some differences are good differences; they keep the spice alive. But, if you constantly feel something is lacking, something that you need to be able to grow with someone, then you are probably right,” she states.
2. They do not help you grow: According to Shivdasani, true love should be selfless. Find out if your partner can help you grow. “I believe the right person would put your growth above their need for you. They believe in the greatness within you and support you. The second you feel caged, you are probably not with the person you should be with,” she says.
3. People say you should get out: It means that there are people who have strong opinions about your relationship, even if you do not live your life based on them. If all the people who love you think that you should get out of this, then it might be something to think about, says the expert, adding that sometimes, the people that love us can see things that we can’t. “If their reasons are valid, hear them out, and then keep those reasons at the back of your mind. If it ends up being true, you’ll know what to do.”
4. Cons versus pros: Find out if the cons outweigh the pros. You will know what to do. Just talk to yourself, says the relationship expert.
5. Is the relationship a crutch? “Sometimes, we hold on to relationships because they are a habit because we simply don’t want to be alone,” says Shivdasani, adding that it is not good enough, especially if there is no love.