When your relationship is first getting off the ground, all you and your spouse can think about is each other.
You communicate your affection, and all feels perfect. Inevitably though, things cool off and reality sets in. And you by now know that ups and downs will naturally occur in your relationship or marriage.
You express your love, and everything seems to be going well. However, eventually things settle down and reality kicks in. And as you are well aware, there will inevitably be highs and lows in your marriage or relationship.You and your spouse essentially can’t think about anything except each other during the honeymoon period of your relationship.
Make Date Night a Priority
A survey from the National Marriage Project found that couples who spend time alone together at least once a week are 3.5 times more likely to report “being happy” in their marriages. And get this: they’re also 3.5 times more “sexually satisfied” in their marriage than couples who don’t make time for each other. So take a hint from happy couples and schedule time for date night—not only does it let you spend time with each other without distractions—it’s also an opportunity to
Give generously to your companion, and chances are they will return the favor.
Inspire Thanks by Responding to Each Other’s Needs
Scientists examined how thankfulness might gradually lead to more positive conduct toward a spouse in a recent study.Give generously to your companion, and chances are they will return the favor.
In the study, they found that we feel thankful for our partner when they’re responsive towards our needs, which in turn, motivates us to respond by attending to their needs, producing a feel-good cycle of gratitude. But someone’s got to set it in motion (and it might as well be you)!
Step Into Their Shoes
Not literally, but figuratively
Frequently, we draw inferences about our partner’s actions before really attempting to understand their thoughts.
For example, if your husband snaps at you when you ask him to lower the volume on the TV, you may immediately feel hurt or unloved, and assume that he’s angry with you for something you did.
Rather, perspective-taking—putting ourselves in our partners’ shoes and attempting to comprehend their ideas and behaviors—is advised by scientists.
Could he have had a disappointing meeting, or gotten yelled at by his boss that day? Could his migraines be acting up again? Taking the time to take your partner’s perspective can help you both in the long run.